Title: How Do You Know Director: James L. Brooks Starring: Reese Witherspoon, Owen Wilson, Paul Rudd, Jack Nicholson Aspect Ratio: 2.35:1 Studio: Columbia Pictures Genre(s): Comedy Rated:       (For sexual content and some strong language)   Buy From Amazon.com: a / a / a / a / a / a

CONSUMER ADVICE

Parents, there is a fair amount of languagefor a PG-13 film. Recommended for ages 15 and up.

Is there any more of a pointless release this year than “How Do You Know?” Despite the presence of some pretty bad movies, I’ve yet to see one as mind numbingly pointless and boring as this one. It defies all logic that this was released, that it cost the amount of money it did ($120 million!!!), and that it managed to get Jack Nicholson’s butt off the couch and make another movie. I saw this movie alone in a late night showing. No one else around. And I got so bored I actually got up, went to the bathroom, stood up against the wall, and paced the theater to keep myself from falling asleep during this snoozefest. The story is so banal I hesitate to even describe it. It revolves around Lisa (Reese Witherspoon), who is a softball player of some sort.

I guess she makes enough money from it to make a decent living, which is surprising because it doesn’t appear to be professional by any means. The movie starts with her being cut from the team and trying to figure out her future prospects. She starts dating a star football player named Matty Reynolds (Owen Wilson), who is an idiot but obviously cares about her. Since he is an idiot though she leaves him multiple times during the film and strikes a friendship with a man named George (Paul Rudd), who is...okay, I have no idea what he does. But he’s being indited by the government on suspicion of something even he’s not aware of.

His father (Nicholson) is aware of what the situation is, though how much he’s willing to share about it is up in the air. And all of this rounds about to...one of the most boring, senile, delusional screenplays I’ve seen. No, it’s not NEARLY as bad as “Sex and the City 2" I suppose! But then, that movie was written by a guy who made a better than expected HBO series and not much else. This movie is written and directed by multi-Academy Award winner James L. Brooks. This is the guy who directed the Best Picture winner “Terms of Endearment,” “Broadcast News,” “As Good As It Gets,” and has been producing “The Simpsons” for the past twenty years.

With a resume like that you expect a lot, LOT more! Instead of a smart screenplay about the downfalls in life and how love can pick you up though, we get a movie where boring morons make stupid decisions and none of them funny. Lisa strikes me as a girl who has no purpose in life and doesn’t seem to care much to find a new purpose once she loses her old job. Instead she bounces between two men. Course Matty is a moron and George is boring, which makes her look all the more like a helpless idiot for putting up with either of them. There are a few moments where she does have some genuine chemistry with Matty though, which makes it all the more baffling the film wants her to get together with George.

Then we have the government inspection...the stupid government investigation of George. If there was a more distracting and pointless side story in a movie this year than this one, then you need to point it out to me because I sure as heck can’t remember a screenplay side-stepping it’s main point so much. Is this as bad as I’m making it sound? Well...maybe not. It’s not exactly painful to sit through, but it’s also hard to keep sitting still at all. The characters are dumb, the situations nonsense, and I don’t think there’s one thing worth rooting for. Watching a romantic comedy without someone to root for is like watching an animated film without any visual flair to it. You can do it, but it takes the patience of a saint.